Surviving Without Electricity

The sun is shining in all its golden majesty. The birds are flying and chirping away with reckless abandon, their freedom entirely theirs. The air is sweet and warm to the skin. My palms are sweaty, my shirt is drenched, my hair is a mess, my forehead entire face is oily, my socks smell like dead bodies having been away from clean water for as long as I can remember. There is no light. What a beautiful Friday morning.

What a beautiful day.

Since the dawn of time, man has relied on electricity to carry out its various chores and activities, some of which are very necessary for survival. Washing clothes, keeping warm, going to war, raping and pillaging its way through cities in the name of conquests, cooking and so on and so forth. Just imagine what life would be if Julius Caesar hadn’t switched on his phone torch when he went to war against… uhm… those people sha.

Of course I know it wasn’t since the dawn of time. Electricity was only just invented three years ago.

I strongly believe in the caption of the picture above because how else would you be able to explain Nigeria still having power issues until now? How please? Anyway, I’m not here to argue about Nigeria’s woes and mismanagements. I am here to talk about how you can manage yourself when there is no light because let’s be honest, as students, we almost literally depend on a working lightbulb for our continued existence.

I wouldn’t have written this article. I had something else in mind entirely for this week but when I heard “from a reliable source” that the problem with electricity was not just in UNILAG but the entire country, I decided to write about it. So, whether or not you’re experiencing electricity issues, here are ways you can survive without power:

1. Charge Your Gadgets When You Can

This is not what I had in mind but we know it’s what will happen last last…

Myself and a number of people I know (namely everybody I know) has a bad habit of being around electricity and refusing to charge. Even you can’t deny that there have been times when you had light and kept on pressing your phone instead of charging it or you were charging and using your phone at the same time.

If you’d like to live in the 21st century and not go back to the stone age, I’d suggest you put that phone down and stick the cord into the hole. No innuendos intended. Or were there?
If you have a class, it is likely that the generator would be on during lecture hours so as to make the class conducive for students. In that case, take your charger along for the essentials like your phone and maybe your laptop too. That way, you would at least have a bit of power to use until NEPA decides to grant us electricity in their benevolence.

2. Stay Off Your Gadgets

See how this phone is resting on the table without the owner’s hands on it? Yeah? Good. Take a hint.

I bet you didn’t see this one coming eh? When you know that there is no light and there might not be power supply for the next couple of days, that is NOT the right time to be surfing Instagram and liking a bunch of fake buttocks. It is not the time to start seeing which odds you can place on Bet9ja. It is not the time to start watching tutorial videos on the 500 different ways you can paint your face.
Save your battery for the important things like calling your family, getting useful information, watching five hours of cartoons, sending money to me etc.

3. Spend Wisely

You get the point.

You’re probably thinking “how exactly will spending my money on puff puff instead of pizza get me electricity?” Well, I don’t know. Last I checked, electricity is generated from water, fuel in gasoline powered generators and three hours of prayers in Nigeria. So, I don’t know the answer to that question but I’m hoping at some point in the next paragraph, I’ll start making sense.

When electricity goes away, a number of things go with it. The first and most common is water. You would have to struggle to take your bath, cook and wash your clothes. Haha. I can still smell those socks. What you want to do is spend your money sensibly so that you would be able to channel it into the things you normally wouldn’t spend money on.

You can’t buy food outside nor can you buy water if you’re broke. Reason am. Here are a couple of ways you can actually manage your spending. Here are a couple of ways you can actually manage your spending.

4. Reduce Your Physical Activity

Not what I had in mind but what I’ll be doing anyway.

Like I said, in most cases, when electricity goes away, water goes along with it. When there’s no water, you can’t take showers and when you can’t take showers, you end up smelling like a certain someone’s pair of socks. To prevent that from happening, the best advice I can give you is to reduce your physical activity. It’s not every time you hear a cheaply made beat that you’ll start dancing like a dying worm. Calm down fess. Stay under shades and try to remain hydrated. That way, you’ll sweat less and smell less.

5. Just Pray

God, please don’t let them notice that I ran out of points because I’m thinking of bread and beans.

I won’t lie, at this point, I pretty much ran out of points but I have this issue where if I go beyond number three, I can’t stop at number four. There has to be a number five. So, ehm…. Pray to God to give you light and sustain you in your trying times. That’s kuku what I’ve been doing.


You may not have light but if you subscribe, at least you'll have quality content.

Conclusion

All of these points are things you probably know already but I think you’d agree with me that this is a much better topic than “How to Boil an Egg Without Burning It.” Right?
Try not to die out there folks.

But just before I leave,

  • Did you enjoy the article? I wasn’t exactly in the right frame of mind when I wrote it.
  • How are you coping with electricity issues at your side since the information is that the problem is nationwide?
  • If you are not experiencing light issues, can you please raise up your hand? I want to charge my phone. No, it doesn’t matter if you’re in Abuja and I’m in Lagos.
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Akachi
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Akachi

Hiii, I currently don’t have light and my phone is currently 14%😬 . Yes, I enjoyed the article. Since there hasn’t been light in a while the torches are dead😭😭 so my phone is my torch, how will you advice me to drop it😭😭😢

Tari
Guest

Well writen but tay leave your phone part. O hard gan

Angelica
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Angelica

I stay off my phone a lot of times but I am also very lazy to charge it when it’s low and Nepa decides to be gracious 😂😂 help!!!!!

Erid
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Erid

Stay off my phone ???Nahhhhh

Great writeup though Ire

Isabel
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Isabel

Let me tell you how buying puff puff instead of pizza helps.. When you order puff puff in the morning, or the day before, before NEPA takes their light in the morning in this stupid school, you would have had your puff puff, and you won’t even have to go all the way out to buy pizza. If you buy #200 puff puff and then use #100 to come pick it up, it’s more economical than spending transport money to the pizza place, waiting, spending thousands on pizza and drink, etc. It doesn’t really save electricity but you get the… Read more »

RestingBitchFace
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RestingBitchFace

Staying off my phone when there’s no light? What do you think I am? A saint?

A girl has no name
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A girl has no name

One thing I learnt from this article is what Irewole does on Instagram 😂😂😂
Well-done… In every sense, I mean.

The Skinny Ninja
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The Skinny Ninja

Staying off my phone is going to be really difficult bruh 😭😭😭 but no choice. My battery is currently 5% 😭😭

Brownie_vocal
Guest

Staying off gadgets is a tricky piece of advice my friend.