“School Is A Scam”

I spent the first thirty minutes before writing this article thinking about all the possible ways I could stretch this article into the standard one thousand words. At this point in my life and the semester, I think it’s safe to say that this writer’s block is no longer a phase. I think it’s safe to say that this is just my way of life now. Constantly fighting to squeeze out articles like someone who has finished his Five Alive but still wants more from the carton.

Did I just diss myself?

Just in case you’re wondering what exactly the heck I’m talking about today, let me simply save you the trouble and just let you know that I am here to rant. Why? Why? Did you just ask me why??? Haha. It’s like you’re looking for trouble.

I’m ranting because I am tired. I am very tired. Over the last couple of weeks, I have been bombarded with tests, assignments, actual work and a number of other things.

Just this week, a lecturer walked into class and started teaching. As usual, he wasn’t making too much sense to me. I placed my head on the table and took a nap. Sadly, it was short lived. The wonderful girl seated next to me tapped me all of a sudden and I knew something was about to go down. After “regaining my consciousness”, I heard the lecturer instruct everyone in the class to write something in their notes.

I didn’t know that they used to do classwork in the university ke.

After struggling to put together pieces from what I heard like two seconds after I woke up and three minutes before I fell asleep, I finally came up with something to write. Lowkey, I was feeling good about myself. I had written almost nothing compared to some other people but at least I was able to make sense. Then, the lecturer told us to tear out that page and submit it.

Wait, what?!

Gbam! Instant stress. My BP rose so high that if someone had pricked me with a needle, the blood coming out would have enough pressure to push him/her backwards.

If you’re confused about that last sentence, there is this thing called exaggeration that writers sometimes use to pass a message. You should look it up.

After submitting the script sha, I accepted my fate. It’s okay nau. I’ll be fine. Two days after, I had a test and the day before the test, this same week, I just wanted to get some sleep. I was tired. As such, I went back to my hostel off campus. I decided to do a couple of things that needed to be done first. Afterwards, around 4pm, I crashed on my bed and decided to take a two hour nap after which I would start a sequence of activities in preparation for my test. Barely thirty minutes into my sleep, I heard the sound of someone playing football upstairs.

How close I was to going upstairs and beating somebody’s child.

I woke up and tried to go back to sleep but the sound kept on coming and coming. Whose idea was it to play an indoor game outside? Ehn? Who thought “hey, the people who invented this game are pretty stupid. Why play it on a standard pitch under the golden glow of the sun when you could play it inside your room, break a couple of things and disturb everyone else?”

That’s how I got no sleep and then possibly flunked the test the next day. (I’m not sure. The result isn’t out yet.) After walking out of the test, I saw a bunch of people clustered around the department’s notice board and then found out that exam timetable was out already.

My reaction…

For the next twenty four hours or so, I was in denial but then another lecturer came in the middle of the day and announced a test I was completely unprepared for. In that moment, I thought about all the times people had asked me when I would start reading and my answer always came back as…

To be very honest, I don’t know why I am writing this article, it doesn’t exactly provide any value to you nor does it solve any of your problems but I am sure you can relate. School is a lot more stress than I envisaged when I first got in and ironically, I am less productive now than I was before I resumed the semester. A lot less as a matter of fact. I miss reading stuff I’m actually interested in. I miss all those talks with my dad. I miss my mum’s food and how she’d go out of her way to make sure I’m fine. Now, I have to deal with assignments, tests, exams and reporting news in parts of the school where I have to contemplate talking about the grass growing or a girl’s clothes getting wet in the rain. (Something that usually doesn’t happen – as I’ve been fervently telling myself so I can actually report and submit this.)


I'm already stressed enough, just subscribe please.

Maybe school is a scam. Maybe it really does not prepare us for the issues that we are going to face in the future. Or maybe you are just a lazy pair of buttocks. I bet you thought I was going to take your side.

You thought wrong. Now go and read your books.

Conclusion

Like I said, I don’t know why I’m writing this but what I do know is that after next week or so, I will be taking an “exam leave.” Y’all won’t be getting anymore articles from me again until sometime in the middle of June.

Anyway,

  • Did you enjoy today’s article?
  • How has school been going for you?
  • Should I rant more often or was this just horrible?
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A girl has no name
Guest

I am still thinking of how I will do myself when I eventuarrily resume another year in September. It is already doing me gbas gbos.

Layo
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Layo

I love this post…..I’m feeling exactly the same way but at the end of the day we’ll be fine

Akachi
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Akachi

Take a break please beacusee I’m just impressed and shocked o that you’re always posting every Friday and replying messages 😱 I’m like is this one not a student too bayii Akachi ehn

Akachi
Guest
Akachi

I feel your pain on a whole other level mehn😭😭 I’m drowning here, I’m drowning 😭. It is a scam! ( Okay I don’t know if you’re feeling all this andrenaline o, yes it’s important yen yen yen please let me just shout). I’ve honestly not come to terms with the stress yet. most times in the morning, I’m like noooo not today, I can’t do this again and really mean it( then go and have my bath because well yunno) . I’m just tired. That’s all PS someone should tell this lecturers that nobody is fighting for the post… Read more »

Latifat
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Latifat

To me school is not exactly a scam, but just another way of suffering. It’s like less than half the time you’re in school, you learn stuff and the remaining time you’re just trying not to fail. Even writing this I am so exhausted. I don’t why my university decided to squeeze a four month course into three weeks. Three fucking weeks!! I am fasting, I rarely sleep and I have tests like twice in a day with exams coming up. But sometimes I see the whole thing as preparation for something bigger. Life itself is way harder than school.… Read more »

Angelica
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Angelica

Likkkkkkeeeeeeeee… Fr tho, exams is coming up soon and I feel like I’ve not read anything I’ve been reading since 😂 I’m just so f tirrrreeeeddddd

Angie Baby
Guest
Angie Baby

I’m crying at how much I can relate to this 😂😂. I want to say “las las we go dey alright” but tbh, idek anymore 😭😭

Take as much time as you need, we love your articles but we wouldn’t want you flunking because of them 🤗

CB
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CB

I’ve not started prepping for my exams and I almost always feel ill😭😭

Adepitan Erioluwa
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Adepitan Erioluwa

😂! Didirin ni e!

Elima💖
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Elima💖

School is actually a big scam…soooooo stressful anyways I HV to do well bc I know there’s Hope for a beta future ahead

RareGem
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RareGem

I have eventuarily started reading….. it is a battle of light on/off in my room… Some prefers reading before sleeping while some prefer sleeping then waking up to read.
thank God for eye cover

Brownie_vocal
Guest

So for 3 weeks…no articles☹️

RestingBitchFace
Guest
RestingBitchFace

School is just a necessary evil. During my sleepless nights, I console myself with the thought of that shitty little piece of paper I’m gonna get after all this stress. Ha ha ha😭😭😭

Isabel
Guest
Isabel

“…..Why play it on a standard pitch under the golden glow of the sun when you could play it inside your room, break a couple of things and disturb everyone else?”

I died😹😹😹😹

Lola
Guest
Lola

Irewole.. I remember all the times I used to diss you for being a bad student and not wanting to go to school. Please find a place in your heart to forgive me.